26th May – As I sat down on my seat in the examination hall, anxiously waiting for the invigilator to distribute the OMR sheets, I contemplated about the year leading up to this day. When I had decided to pursue a career in law, I had no idea what I was getting into. The grueling preparation to get into a decent law school had overtaken my life, to the point that I had no concern for anything else.
It was perhaps at the beginning of my 12th grade that I realized I wanted to pursue a career in law. Being somewhat late in having this epiphany, I knew I had to give this thought, my all. I joined a coaching institute to prepare for CLAT, because I didn’t want to leave anything to chance. I studied like a man possessed, doing as much as I could. Through it all, my parents and my brother were always there to keep me going and served as my inspiration. After finishing my board examinations, I doubled up on studying like a maniac. First examination that I had to tackle was the AILET, which I did not think I would have been able to clear, even in my wildest dreams and somehow was contemplating even applying for it; thankfully my brother talked me out of making an idiotic decision. Since I went in with no expectations, I didn’t feel even the slightest hint of pressure and somehow I was able to make it on the other side. But the dreaded day was yet to come and I had to keep going, yet I found myself unable to do so. I had reached my breaking point. I had burned myself out. The long hours of studying, endless mocks, and continuous self-deprecation had finally got to me. In the two weeks preceding CLAT, I had become lethargic and cynical, devoid of any motivation. I don’t know how many of you have experienced this but it truly was the worst experience of my life. I had become doubtful about my capabilities and competency. It was perhaps the intervention of my friends and family that brought me back from the brink but I wondered, was it too late?
On the day of CLAT, I got out of bed, still hazy from a sleepless night. I felt nervous from that point on, till the moment I got my OMR sheet, not to say that the preceding two months were any better. I don’t exactly remember what happened in those two hours but after handing over my answer sheet, I was happy that it was finally over. I still feel that the preceding ordeal had cost me a lot but I knew it didn’t matter. I had given everything I had and if that wasn’t enough, then so be it! If you ever fall into this abyss, remember that you’re grinding it out for a purpose. It’s not to qualify a stupid exam, but to prepare yourself for the challenges that lie ahead so that you can take them on, instead of running away from them. The skills that you’ll develop in your preparation will not only come in handy in your college life, but will serve you throughout the rest of your life.
Self-doubt is something that, perhaps, everyone experiences at some point in their life. It is something that keeps you grounded and helps combat complacency but it is important to never let it overtake you. I know this sounds easier said than done. The highly competitive nature of CLAT and AILET is bound to give jitters to any aspirant but there’s only one sure way to tackle this – remind yourself why you are doing this, why you’re putting yourselves through all this. This will give one the clarity one desperately needs amidst this pandemonium; I know it did the trick for me (albeit with some external help). If you think you’ve find your calling, then don’t let anything get in your way and give everything you’ve got to achieve your goal.
Please leave a comment below in case you have further any queries with regards to preparation. In case you are desperately in need of a Personalized Action Plan, please read this.
Could you please suggest me from where to get the static GK part? And a planning strategy.
Thank you